Everyone has something away from loved ones that helps them through tough times, whether it be a favourite film, a band who’s music resonates with you, curling up with a book or even a hobby! In the darkest moments of my life, one thing was been constant and that’s my love for Disney.
Disney is home. It’s cosy and comfy and warm! When I’m doing well, I watch Disney films and when I’m not having such a great time, I watch Disney films. Disney is my go to thing for every moment. There’s always a Disney reference to chuck into a conversation and there’s always, always the time to burst into song… especially Under the Sea.
Have I mentioned Disney enough?
Disney teaches us to follow our own path, be brave, face our fears, not to judge a book by its cover and the importance of friendship! I’m curious like Alice, loyal like Woody and have a sense of adventure like Rapunzel. There is so many relatable characters and so many life lessons to take in. It’s a wonderful world of fantasy, yet so real for many of us.
There is no cure for my mental illness, but learning to live with it is key. You’ll hear tunes from Robin Hood, Aladdin, The Aristocats, Tarzan, The Little Mermaid and more coming from my house on a daily basis. Listening to the joyful songs brings me hope and happiness and makes me smile. I spend a lot of time at home currently, so this makes my day more manageable.
Life is full of ups and downs, so find something to help ground you, something to make you realise it’ll be okay and that you can do this!
In January 2015, I found myself being discharged from hospital, along with a brand new working diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (Also known as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder). The main doctor on the ward had given me various guides and help sheets on the condition, but nothing really sunk in.
Was this really the right diagnosis for me?
Fast forward to 2018 – It’s five days before Christmas and I’m sat surrounded by a new consultant psychiatrist, community psychiatric nurse and some other health care professionals. That’s when they tell me, “this is most definitely Borderline Personality Disorder”. The discussion on my emotional state, current situation and past diffculities continues until it’s decided I shall be referred to a personality disorder therapy service and have ongoing support from a CPN. I was officially diagnosed.
Coming to terms and learning to cope with a mental health diagnosis can be super difficult and it’s hard to know where to turn for advice and support, as you just feel so lost and overwhelmed. Even though I had the working diagnosis for a while before being properly diagnosed, there was still a slight pain in my chest when this was confirmed. I was open about my mental health struggles and saying I had BPD, but I had never really sat and thought about what this meant for me.
It can be challenging but helpful to be able to see why you’re doing stuff and that there’s a reason for your behaviours. I can understand my triggers in certain situations now and this makes me less confused about how I’m feeling.
Borderline Personality Disorder is one of the most misunderstood and stigmatized mental health conditions – you need to remember that even though people may not understand, there is so many others out there going through similar experiences and you are definitely not alone in this! I am no expert, but by sharing my struggles I hope that someone may find comfort in knowing they aren’t the only one feeling scared about learning to cope with a mental health condition.
Remember to not be consumed by your diagnosis. You are so much more than that…
I’m Charlotte and it’s nice to meet you! I like vintage dresses, Disney movies, bunnies, playing board games, dancing around my house to Mcfly and crafting. Here you’ll find my journey. I hope you’ll stay for a cuppa 🙂